Marisa's Laughter Page

Funnies recommended by Marisa:

Hee Haw Laffs on VHS from PulseTV (look for the comedy tapes)

I've discovered audio books! With a 28-mile commute (well, when I'm not working HERE at home), I can get some use out of those. Here are two from a couple of my favorite humorists:

I haven't read this one, but it looks funny! From e-campus.com.

Look for books by Lewis Grizzard and Dave Barry at

For those who like their humor a little more raw (not for children - I'd call it PG-13):

This is the afore-mentioned James Gregory show:

It Could Be The Law, I Don't Know

My copy has the same material on both sides. That's OK though - it's just as funny the 30th time you listen to it!

More of my faves:

Coming soon: the Tim Wilson CD with "The Jeff Gordon Song"! Keep checking with

Check out these cards - they take on a totally new meaning for me this year...

Bill Engvall thinks signs are funny too.

This looks funny.

Al Franken is just too cool.

September 9, 2002

Where do they get these ideas?

Today my supervisor asked me to look through some technical manuals for a piece of information requested by one of her superiors. I found what I was looking for, but on the way I ran across a few strange warnings.

On one page I read, "The cables from the gantry connect to the detector head by the connector cable on the back of the detector." The next paragraph said, "WARNING! Do not use the connector cable as a handle for rotating the detector."

Laughing, I read this to my supervisor, who snickered and said, "You know, somebody must've done that, or else it wouldn't be in the book."

I was reminded of part of James Gregory's act where he talks about warning labels. He'll say, "You know what that means? Sometime in the past, some NUT said to his wife..." well, I won't give it away. You'll have to buy the tape for yourself. James will appreciate it!

This afternoon on the way home my little girl put a Skittle in her recorder. I mean a recorder the musical instrument...not the kind you make tapes with. I don't know what she was thinking. Did she think it would make sweet music? Was she trying to cook the Skittle through some magic hot breath trick? I'm not sure.

The whole Skittle incident inspired me to come up with some warnings for objects based on some of our family's misadventures.

All commodes should carry this warning: May be hazardous to pagers.

All Power Ranger toys should bear this warning: If head is flushed down the commode, it will not grow back.

All musical instruments need this label: NOT a candy dispenser.

Guitar amps are NOT cat beds. This should be clearly marked as well.

Everything plastic that will fit into a child's hand ought to be labeled "May be destroyed by dogs." This includes water pistols, compact discs, pencils, Legos, library books, TV remotes, and pagers.

Cats should come with the label "May be hazardous to the health of your furniture." This applies to some dogs as well (mine included).

Well, that's about all the warning labels I can think of at the moment. Still, I can't help but wonder who came up with some of those real product warnings. What made the idiot pull the connector cable on the back of the detector like a handle?

*********************

At the dinner table we were discussing street names. We didn't exactly mean to get on that subject. I think we were discussing dreams, and I was talking about how I have recurring dreams about the same places. It's almost like an alternative world, where I go do different things at this same location over and over and over.

Of course the hubby and kids were getting a real laugh out of my attempt at dream interpretation. They started naming the streets in my dream and my daughter - the same one who tried to cook a Skittle - said, "Do you live on Lois Lane? Peoples Court?"

Well, the Peoples Court street name just hit us all in the funny bone. I couldn't stop laughing. The man of the house suggested that Peoples Court should cross Wopner Lane. I countered that Judge Mills Lane would be a better cross-street.

I know, this really sounds like it doesn't fit in with the subject at the beginning. But, really, it does. I think street names, at least in my neck of the woods, must've been created by the same people who hang on the connector cable. We live near a street called Bee Tee Lane. Bee Tee! Seriously! We do have a Sweet Home Road - that's not so bad. We have roads named Possum Trot, Gause, Trough Springs, Mudcat, Dripping Spring, Little Hope, Copper Kettle, Saddle Tree, Lost Hollow, Marrowbone, Trouble, Neptune, Bucksnort, Boat Factory, Green Acres, Wandaland, Buck Hill, and Dead End, all within 30 miles of us. And then, there are the roads named after people: Dick Farmer, Pickle Knight, Cotton Harris, Red Binkley. One has to wonder what THEIR parents were thinking. But hey, I named my son after a rock star, who am I to judge?

OH! I almost forgot. We have a Lois Lane here too.

So, in conclusion, I have to create another warning. Road names may be hazardous to your health. If you laugh too hard as you round a corner, you might end up in the hospital!

Where do you want to go?

Rissy's Treasures

The Frank Sutton Web Page

Risa's Hee Haw Tribute Page

Marisa's Home Page

2001 Archive

August 28 - the first one - be gentle with me, I was just starting out!

Sept. 19 - The ""Hit Me For a Sale'' installment - Yes, I admit I was a little rough on the salespeople! Read ONLY if you are tired of having to buy stuff at parties, etc. !

Sept. 26 - Is it really in his kiss? Judge for yourself.

Oct. 7 - Is Visa really everywhere you want to be? Or where you don't want to be?

Nov. 17 - I'm much too young to be this darn old!

2002 Archive

Jan. 31 - Homesporting

Feb. 28 - Kids say the...well, you know the kind of things they say!

Apr. 3 - Your car says what you wish your mouth did!

July 3 - Happy Independence Day!

August 21 - Does absence make the heart grow fonder?